Mirroring

For many years I liked whoever I was married to or dating liked. If they liked a certain food I liked it. If they liked certain people, I liked them as well. If they were upset, sad, or angry I was as well, same thing with being happy and so on. They cried, I cried, and the list could go on and on. It's called a "mirroring effect." You pick up on the people around you and act or like the things they do.

I had to find a way to break habit as it wasn't me. Eventually I would stop mirroring and start rebelling, which just created problems since the person I was with didn't understand where I was coming from or what was going on. I made it easy to leave or for them to walk away from me. Funny thing is, I noticed that I'm not the only one to do it. People with a mental illness have a tendency to want to please everyone or we run them off. Many of us though for the wrong reasons. We can't keep someone just because we are afraid to be lonely, nor can we simply mirror them to make them happy.

We need to be our own-selves. After all, we matter as individuals. Never stoop to please someone else by giving up your love for various things. Be that individual that you were born to be.

Some ways to stop:

1) never give up on yourself to make someone else happy.

2) just because the other in your life likes something, doesn't mean you have to like it also (unless of course you truly do like it).

3) try doing your own thing once in a while.

4) remind yourself your an individual, separate from your partner.

5) remember what you like and express it so that you never forget it.

6) learn to compromise.

7) look into self-esteem classes or groups

8) tell yourself every day that you are a unique individual

9) try it once and if you don't like it or aren't into it then let your partner know. honesty is the best policy.

10) every week, you and your partner try something new that neither of you have done before.

11) learn to recognize your own TRUE feelings and emotions.

Try a few of these ideas and if you find they work for you, keep trying them, if they don't then learn something new that works for you. After all we can't keep hurting ourselves in this manner. Remember, we are all each unique individuals who deserve a chance at a happy and long life. After all mirroring someone can drain us of our energy and freedoms.

Lori

Love and Happiness with a Mental Illness

Those of us with a mental illness have a tendency to love to much or to little. We haven't learned how to truly find the happiness that we deserve instead we always settle for what we get or what we feel we deserve. They tell us to love ourself, but those of us with a mental illness rarely have the strength to love ourselves, let alone someone else. So where do we find the strength? 

I've finally (let me rephrase that, "i think I've finally") learned the answer on how to love myself. Repetition! By giving myself self talks and learning to believe in what I'm telling myself I have learned to love myself for the first time in my life. It was a very long and very hard process, but I was able to do it when I had NO faith in myself.

I know many of you are saying; "that's you, not all of us can do that."

Stop doubting and start believing in yourself. You are all better then that! Don't live in your disease, don't live in your past, and never forget your better then all those put together. 

Bipolar Support and Self-Help

Bipolar Support and Self-Help

LIVING AND COPING WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER

Although bipolar disorder tends to be a lifelong, recurrent illness, there are many things you can do to help yourself. Beyond the treatment you get from your doctor or therapist, there are many things you can do to reduce your symptoms and stay on track, including educating yourself about bipolar disorder, surrounding yourself with people you can count on, and leading a healthy “wellness” lifestyle.

You’re not powerless when it comes to bipolar disorder. With good coping skills and a solid support system, you can live fully and productively and keep the symptoms of bipolar disorder in check.

Living with bipolar disorder: What you can do to help yourself

Living well with bipolar disorder requires certain adjustments. Like recovering alcoholics who avoid drinking or diabetics who take insulin, if you have bipolar disorder, it’s important to make healthy choices for yourself. Making these healthy choices will help you keep your symptoms under control, minimize mood episodes, and take control of your life.

Managing bipolar disorder starts with proper treatment, including medication and therapy. But there is so much more you can do to help yourself on a day-to-day basis. The daily decisions you make influence the course of your illness: whether your symptoms get better or worse; whether you stay well or experience a relapse; and how quickly you rebound from a mood episode.

Bipolar Help

Where to Get Help When You Can’t Afford to See a Doctor

By CANDIDA FINK MD

Bipolar disorder affects not only your health and well being – it can also negatively affect your personal finances. In the U.S. right now, job loss typically equates with the eventual loss of insurance and no income to pay out of pocket for treatment. So where can you turn for help when you can’t afford to see a doctor or purchase the medications that doctor eventually prescribes?

Check to see if your county has a health department (I believe that most do or can refer you to a neighboring county that does). As we explain in Bipolar Disorder for Dummies, a doctor will need to do a thorough evaluation to rule out other possibilities, such as thyroid problems or other medical or psychiatric disorders, that could cause similar symptoms.

In our book, we also point out other free or low-cost care options, including the following:

• State or local Mental Health America affiliate: call 1-800-969-6642 or search the directory at www.nmha.org/go/searchMHA
• Community mental health clinic
• University programs – check with any state universities in your area
• Religious organizations – if you belong to a church, contact your minister
• State medical assistance
• Look up the Social Security office in your area and see if they can do anything for you
• Your child may qualify for free or low-cost insurance, too – visitwww.insurekidsnow.gov for details
• If you have a local NAMI or DBSA group in your area, they can also offer you support and redirect you to state & local resources.

If you have a close friend or family member who can help you navigate these resources, enlist their assistance. Tracking down assistance and then jumping through hoops to get what you need can be very difficult and stressful in and of itself. If possible, it helps to have someone who can share the burden.

If you’re having trouble paying for prescription medications, check out our post “Can’t Afford Your Bipolar Medications?”

Article Copied from PsychCentral.