Self Harm. Why we do it and ways to stop.

A lot of people with mental illnesses self harm. We do it to release the pain that is in our minds. As a self harmer I often wonder why it has all of a sudden become a national past time with the younger generation being as once you start, you have an even harder time stopping. Cutting has fallen into the hands of our teenagers and even younger generation. Many do it just because they saw someone else do it so they thought they would try it. Many do it because they are truly in pain and feel they need an outlet and cutting gives them that outlet.

But how do you tell who needs the help and who is just trying to fit in by acting like their friends?

A troubled cutter cuts uncontrollably and deep. Someone who is cutting because their friends do it will make scratches here and there.

Self mutilation has become a such a big new trend not just in America, but around the world. Because many people feel it is just a trend, no one knows how to help people who cut, burn, or harm themselves in other ways. Some families hide it, brush it under the rug. Some throw their kids to the therapist while still ignoring that their child has a problem. So what exactly is the right thing to do to get your loved one the help they need?

Self mutilation is no joke and should be taken very seriously. While we don't intend to kill ourselves, some accidently cut to deep and end up taking their own lives. Where do we draw the line at how to help one another? Do we shove people into therapy, forgetting about their aftercare? Do we walk on egg shells so not to make people harm themselves? Do we tell the person they are stupid for doing it and ignore them? Do we brush it a side and not take a second glance at it? No, we don't do any of these things. Instead we stand up for them and get them the help they need; being there with them every step of the way.

For those of us who self-harm, it's not just about the cutting. It comes down to the feeling, the burning, the bleeding, the needing, the cleaning up, the scars, the healing, it all comes down to FEELING. The feeling that we are alive, the fact that we can have emotions, and the fact that we can feel. We need these emotions to remember we are real, that we aren't just our pain. 

I quit cutting 6 years ago and I still struggle with it each and everyday. There are days when the urge to cut is so great that I keep a box of razors where I can see them to remind myself that I don't need to do it. I have a system in my house, 1) when I start thinking about cutting I take one out of the box and carry it everywhere I go, 2) when the urge becomes stronger I tell someone I have them, 3) when the urge becomes to great I turn the blade over to someone who I can trust to get rid of it properly. Now I know I could come back and use another one  if I wanted to but I don't. If I need to still cut, I go through the process all over again. 

Instead of cutting yourself, try a few of these different techniques.

1. Cut a piece of paper
2. Hammer a nail into a piece of wood
3. Cut up or hammer a piece of fruit
4. Draw or color uncontrollably
5. Throw balls at a wall
6. Write everything that comes to your mind, not caring if it's perfect or worded right
7. Exercise to your hearts content
8. Play with an animal
9. Take something non-sharp and run it across your skin like you would a razor
10. Tell yourself you can do this and resist the urge to cut, rewarding yourself instead.

We all need inspiration. It's what you choose to do with yours that determines whether or not you cut. Only you can make that choice. Try to take one less cut a day. Then the next day take one less cut, and so on till one day you notice your not cutting anymore. Tell yourself your tired of not just the physical pain, but the mental pain your putting yourself through as well. There are other ways to go about not cutting. Find someone you know you can trust and talk to them about your pain and anger or whatever issues are bothering you enough to make you cut. We all need help at some point from some where, so please find yours. 

Remember, Recovery Can Happen!